Just because I’m single doesn’t mean I want to mingle!

January. Not only the most depressing month of the year, when no one has any money and everyone is fat after Christmas, but also the month when the shops become full of love. It’s everywhere staring you in the face, love hearts, chocolates, red roses – Valentine’s Day. Another beautiful reminder that yes, you are still single. In fact you’ve actually almost lost count of how many years you have been single for because it’s been THAT long.

It’s not that there aren’t any men around, because according to my highly reliable source (Wikipedia) there are actually about 3.5 billion of the scallywags roaming this earth. It just seems to be that none of them are quite the ‘right’ one for me. And I’m not prepared to settle for just anyone.

For quite a long time being single did bother me, most of my friends are in relationships – and most of those have been long term, so I’ve often felt like the odd one out or that awkward third wheel. It is only recently following an around the world adventure, that I did completely solo, that I have realised being in a relationship is not the be all and end all.

For a start where did this ridiculous notion that we have to be in a relationship to be happy come from? There are pressures coming from endless directions, it’s like you can’t avoid the subject. Family – parents especially wanting grandchildren. Friends who try to set you up with people who either; you are completely not interested in, or they aren’t interested in you (plain fucking awkward in my books). Then there’s the media, magazine covers splashed with ‘how to’ articles, and Facebook with its suggested adverts for match.com and various other dating sites. It’s literally everywhere like a huge fat plague.

At this point I would like to mention that I’m not some complete freak who has never had any interaction with the male species because I have, probably more so than is necessary but you know that’s just how the cookie crumbles. And maybe it is because of these interactions that I have remained single mostly because the only men who seem to be interested in me for more than my lady parts are complete weirdos. Let me introduce you to them.

Exhibit one: the random Facebook message

So there I was happily sat on Facebook stalking away as you do, when I got a random friend request. This doesn’t tend to happen too often these days so I was intrigued and decided to message said male. Here is our conversation

Please tell me how this is normal? I probably should have found the first response a bit odd let’s face it who adds all their ‘people you may know’ anyway. Needless to say I swiftly blocked him and moved on.

Exhibit two: the charity man

You may be aware of the charity man if you have read previous entry’s on Hannah’s blog. However if not I shall give you a brief update.  I met said charity man whilst shopping, he ended up giving me my number and I texted him. Here was his was his reply:

Who the fuck is Eden? Yes that’s right he didn’t even know which one of the many I was. No ego boosts here! Kudos to whoever voted I didn’t text – you my friend were correct.

I won’t bore you with anymore, quite frankly, embarrassing encounters I think you get the idea. But what have I learnt from this? I’ve learnt that my twenties are going to be my selfish years. I worked hard for my career, and I worked hard to go travelling, both of which I did by myself.

I’ve learnt that freedom is valuable and while I’m single I have nothing to hold me back, I can travel when and where I want, I can live where I want, I can stay out late and the only person I have to answer to is myself, plus I don’t have to share a bed with anyone – hello starfish! Most importantly I get to learn who I am, what’s important to me, and to love myself.

Basically I’m a strong independent woman and I don’t need no man, well not just yet anyway.


– Guest Blogger: QueenB


If you fancy joining the guest blogging movement – feel free to get in touch – and express your dating stories!

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Alan Sugar Pick Up

Good day. I’m back. .

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After 6000 views last year I have decided that just because I currently have a man locked in a Harry Potter cupboard – this does count as a boyfriend. I feed him sandwichesI This boyfriend thing, doesn’t mean I cannot write about the ways of the dating world. I am the inner goddess. I am the spokesperson for all those dating and love problems that you may have. So, this means I want you to tell me what’s wrong, or indeed right.

Recently, one of my best friends did just that – she sought my powerful advice. Take note.

She was approached in the street by one of those people that get you to sign up and give money for charities. Let me point out I am not here to make fun of the charity people – who do an amazing and wonderful job. Anyhow – this man got talking to the lovely lady in the street. He wanted her to give money to a charity – I am sure he discussed the great need and facts. She wanted to of course get on and continue her stroll within the centre of the city she currently resides.

However that is not how the story goes, Let me set the scene, It was raining. As the rain poured the beautiful lady had her coat hood up – because you protect your face. Anyhow a young man guided my friend into a sheltered area – how delightful. She of course whipped off her hood in a seductive way and with a hair flick…. he exclaimed oh you’re a red head I love red heads. Women being women – the lady of course disagreed and said it was brown but would accept the compliment.

He spent approximately two seconds discussing the charity and then the rest was conversation and I quote…

Standard shit like ‘so what’s your boyfriends name?’ Me ‘oh I don’t have one’ him ‘surely not’ you get the jist.

Oh this man pulled the ‘pen trick’ – you know the whole mean girls thing when she’s like what’s the date today and he says the date. Same deal but with a pen. I wonder really where he stashed his pen. He is a charity man. Who doesn’t have a pen when they are a charity man.

However, instead of getting what he wanted – her card details, address and three digit security pin. He who ,I am told on good authority, is a bit of a ‘looker’ – somehow ended up giving something to her. No it was not a leaflet. It was his number on a tattered bit of paper he had ripped off one of his charities leaflets…

‘when you get the course call from the charity don’t mention this bit..’ As he wrote down his number.

I MEAN SERIOUSLY!

It would appear that it was quite the conversation. Apparently – Get this they discussed star signs and that he lived with his nan whilst She lived with her parents.

I have been asked to give my Twitter information to a young charity man before! So my friend, maybe it is the in thing. Maybe it is the thing to do – build your contact sphere and all.

Furthermore, my friend in question had gone to Primark to buy some sports clothes to and I quote ‘Cheer herself up….’

Maybe the whole New Year, New You gym clothes thing made her ooze sexual and all powerful natural women.

Or… is this the new way? People have given up on dating websites and have decided to get what is basically an Alan Sugar type street selling job. This young man is all about getting paid to pick up women.
Now… I have discussed in great detail with the young lady in question what this means.

I mean come on… does this mean this young man is highly desperate? Was it an ‘oh’ at first sight?

What the hell do you do now? The ball is her court. Does she text this young man? What on earth do you say…?

‘Hi, we met on the street and you tried to get me to sign up to give some money to a charity. I was wearing…’

Are we surprised by such an action that would only usually occur in most probably a nightclub when you are pretty drunk, or not – drinking isn’t cool. I was baffled and my advice was probably the worst. I was like ‘just text him’ and she replied when?. I then said now. Maybe that was poor advice. I was just really interested – then my mind moved into a kind of Bridget Jones trance. I then pictured her wedding with charity man who had asked her for money and instead given her his number. It is a story made by the stalks in heaven.
But really, do we have to be worried? Is this the future? Are we going to be sidestepped in the street, the café, the supermarket – I mean a man in a car at the traffic lights winked at me the other day and rolled down his window to wish me a nice day – what next he takes out his number on a stick and pokes it at me while we wait at a red traffic light? Heaven forbid.

Therefore ladies and gentleman the dating blog is back. We want comments. I want bloody interaction. I don’t waste 30 minutes of my life writing these joyful conundrums to be laughed at and then forgotten.
So what should she do? Message back or delete? You decide.