Alan Sugar Pick Up

Good day. I’m back. .


After 6000 views last year I have decided that just because I currently have a man locked in a Harry Potter cupboard – this does count as a boyfriend. I feed him sandwichesI This boyfriend thing, doesn’t mean I cannot write about the ways of the dating world. I am the inner goddess. I am the spokesperson for all those dating and love problems that you may have. So, this means I want you to tell me what’s wrong, or indeed right.

Recently, one of my best friends did just that – she sought my powerful advice. Take note.

She was approached in the street by one of those people that get you to sign up and give money for charities. Let me point out I am not here to make fun of the charity people – who do an amazing and wonderful job. Anyhow – this man got talking to the lovely lady in the street. He wanted her to give money to a charity – I am sure he discussed the great need and facts. She wanted to of course get on and continue her stroll within the centre of the city she currently resides.

However that is not how the story goes, Let me set the scene, It was raining. As the rain poured the beautiful lady had her coat hood up – because you protect your face. Anyhow a young man guided my friend into a sheltered area – how delightful. She of course whipped off her hood in a seductive way and with a hair flick…. he exclaimed oh you’re a red head I love red heads. Women being women – the lady of course disagreed and said it was brown but would accept the compliment.

He spent approximately two seconds discussing the charity and then the rest was conversation and I quote…

Standard shit like ‘so what’s your boyfriends name?’ Me ‘oh I don’t have one’ him ‘surely not’ you get the jist.

Oh this man pulled the ‘pen trick’ – you know the whole mean girls thing when she’s like what’s the date today and he says the date. Same deal but with a pen. I wonder really where he stashed his pen. He is a charity man. Who doesn’t have a pen when they are a charity man.

However, instead of getting what he wanted – her card details, address and three digit security pin. He who ,I am told on good authority, is a bit of a ‘looker’ – somehow ended up giving something to her. No it was not a leaflet. It was his number on a tattered bit of paper he had ripped off one of his charities leaflets…

‘when you get the course call from the charity don’t mention this bit..’ As he wrote down his number.


It would appear that it was quite the conversation. Apparently – Get this they discussed star signs and that he lived with his nan whilst She lived with her parents.

I have been asked to give my Twitter information to a young charity man before! So my friend, maybe it is the in thing. Maybe it is the thing to do – build your contact sphere and all.

Furthermore, my friend in question had gone to Primark to buy some sports clothes to and I quote ‘Cheer herself up….’

Maybe the whole New Year, New You gym clothes thing made her ooze sexual and all powerful natural women.

Or… is this the new way? People have given up on dating websites and have decided to get what is basically an Alan Sugar type street selling job. This young man is all about getting paid to pick up women.
Now… I have discussed in great detail with the young lady in question what this means.

I mean come on… does this mean this young man is highly desperate? Was it an ‘oh’ at first sight?

What the hell do you do now? The ball is her court. Does she text this young man? What on earth do you say…?

‘Hi, we met on the street and you tried to get me to sign up to give some money to a charity. I was wearing…’

Are we surprised by such an action that would only usually occur in most probably a nightclub when you are pretty drunk, or not – drinking isn’t cool. I was baffled and my advice was probably the worst. I was like ‘just text him’ and she replied when?. I then said now. Maybe that was poor advice. I was just really interested – then my mind moved into a kind of Bridget Jones trance. I then pictured her wedding with charity man who had asked her for money and instead given her his number. It is a story made by the stalks in heaven.
But really, do we have to be worried? Is this the future? Are we going to be sidestepped in the street, the café, the supermarket – I mean a man in a car at the traffic lights winked at me the other day and rolled down his window to wish me a nice day – what next he takes out his number on a stick and pokes it at me while we wait at a red traffic light? Heaven forbid.

Therefore ladies and gentleman the dating blog is back. We want comments. I want bloody interaction. I don’t waste 30 minutes of my life writing these joyful conundrums to be laughed at and then forgotten.
So what should she do? Message back or delete? You decide.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s